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Growing up in foster care
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| H&N photos by Andrew Mariman Denise Reyes, a recruitment and retention officer with the state Department of Human Services, talks with a former foster child, Tamira, Tuesday. Reyes administers the foster and adoptive program at DHS, helping place children like Tamira in good homes. |
By STEVE KADEL
H&N Staff Writer
Tamira’s birth mother was an alcoholic who suffered from bipolar disorder. Her father was not part of the family.
Tamira and her younger sister moved frequently with their mom and never put down roots. When Tamira was 13, her mother overdosed on medications and had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
That’s when Tamira and her sister went to live with a friend of their mother. It was the first of several temporary situations, as the girls bounced from foster home to foster home.
Tamira said she grew up expecting never to see a stable home life.
Then she and her sister were placed with a Klamath Falls couple who changed everything for them. The couple began as foster parents, but before long things were going so well they decided to adopt the two girls.
It was the girls’ fifth foster home.
“The other homes weren’t real homes to me,” said Tamira, who will soon enroll at Brigham Young University to study elementary education. “When I came here I was standoffish.”
That changed as trust in her new foster parents grew. Now, after a year and a half in the home, she has a bright smile as she talks about her adoptive parents Kurt and Jamie, who have a houseful of children with three adopted, and four of their own.
Kim Grant, Tamira’s state Department of Human Services caseworker, said the success story is even better because teenagers are the most difficult age of children to place.
“They have more healing to be done,” she said.
Tamira is now 18 and her sister 14. Tamira’s acceptance of her new parents was shown in an essay she wrote for school.
“I look into the future not dreading one bit of my new decision,” she wrote. “You are my family for eternity. I wish there was hope out there for every single one of those children to be adopted as me and my sister were.”
Lots of foster children
Denise Reyes, who is recruitment and retention specialist for DHS’ Child Welfare Office, also wishes every placement could end as happily as that of Tamira and her sister. But there are lots of foster children and more foster parents are always needed.
“All of our children are considered special needs children because of the circumstances they come from,” Reyes said.
That may be exhibited as excess anger or in other ways, including lack of interest and success in school. Sometimes there are handicaps to overcome from birth.
“We have little ones who come in addicted to meth,” Reyes said, “and alcohol-affected children can be damaged for life.”
There are 192 children in foster homes in Klamath County and two dozen in Lake County. The children in various age groups include 0 to 6 years old, 89 children; 7 to 12 years old, 43 children; and 13 to 17 years old, 60 children.
There were 52 adoptions in Klamath and Lake counties in 2007.
Statewide, 15,060 children were placed in some kind of foster care for at least one day during 2007.
Children go out of the system after reaching age 18 or graduating from high school. Many take an independent living program through Integral Youth Services to develop living skills.
State reimbursements
The state of Oregon provides monthly reimbursement to foster parents. The amount of money depends on the child’s age. The current rates are $399 for children ages 0 to 5, $414 for ages 6 to 12, and $512 for those 13 and older. The reimbursement is meant to cover room and board, clothing replacement, and personal incidentals or allowance.
It usually takes two to three months to be certified as a foster parent, Reyes said. Relatives sometimes go through the process more quickly, but they still must undergo all the requirements as non-relatives.
“Our goal is to return children to their biological parents if possible,” Reyes said, adding that relatives are a second-best choice. “The family provides stability for kids. It’s less frightening.”
If relatives aren’t available, DHS officials try to place with someone who knows the child. “We have a high need for teen homes,” Reyes said.
Help from the community
In addition to help a caseworker can provide, foster parents get support from the Foster Adoptive Parents Association. There’s a clothing closet to help new foster and adoptive parents outfit children, and there’s access to some furniture and car seats.
Faith Tabernacle and United Evangelical Free Church give school supplies and backpacks, Reyes noted.
“This community donates to support the families,” she said. “The churches are fabulous resources. It’s in their hearts to reach out.”
The Child Welfare Office also finds respite care for foster parents.
“They need to take a break,” Reyes said. “It’s healthy for the children and for them.”
Part of potential foster parent assessment is deciding how many children are appropriate for a home. Guidelines are up to seven children for a two-parent household and up to four children for a one-parent household.
Reyes said there is a big need for foster families in which one adult can stay at home with the child or children. The state does not provide day care for children while parents work.
Reyes said potential foster parents must think carefully about getting involved.
“It’s a very big job, being a foster parent,” she said. “It’s a rewarding job, too.”
Becoming a foster parent
Denise Reyes of the state Department of Human Services’ Child Welfare Office presents a monthly forum for those who want to learn more about being a foster or adoptive parent.
Sessions are from 6 to 7:30 p.m. the first Wednesday of every month at the Klamath Youth Development Center, 2200 N. Eldorado Ave. Those wishing to attend are asked to register by calling 850-3663 prior to the meeting.
Tamira and her younger sister moved frequently with their mom and never put down roots. When Tamira was 13, her mother overdosed on medications and had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance.
That’s when Tamira and her sister went to live with a friend of their mother. It was the first of several temporary situations, as the girls bounced from foster home to foster home.
Tamira said she grew up expecting never to see a stable home life.
Then she and her sister were placed with a Klamath Falls couple who changed everything for them. The couple began as foster parents, but before long things were going so well they decided to adopt the two girls.
It was the girls’ fifth foster home.
“The other homes weren’t real homes to me,” said Tamira, who will soon enroll at Brigham Young University to study elementary education. “When I came here I was standoffish.”
That changed as trust in her new foster parents grew. Now, after a year and a half in the home, she has a bright smile as she talks about her adoptive parents Kurt and Jamie, who have a houseful of children with three adopted, and four of their own.
Kim Grant, Tamira’s state Department of Human Services caseworker, said the success story is even better because teenagers are the most difficult age of children to place.
“They have more healing to be done,” she said.
Tamira is now 18 and her sister 14. Tamira’s acceptance of her new parents was shown in an essay she wrote for school.
“I look into the future not dreading one bit of my new decision,” she wrote. “You are my family for eternity. I wish there was hope out there for every single one of those children to be adopted as me and my sister were.”
Lots of foster children
Denise Reyes, who is recruitment and retention specialist for DHS’ Child Welfare Office, also wishes every placement could end as happily as that of Tamira and her sister. But there are lots of foster children and more foster parents are always needed.
“All of our children are considered special needs children because of the circumstances they come from,” Reyes said.
That may be exhibited as excess anger or in other ways, including lack of interest and success in school. Sometimes there are handicaps to overcome from birth.
“We have little ones who come in addicted to meth,” Reyes said, “and alcohol-affected children can be damaged for life.”
There are 192 children in foster homes in Klamath County and two dozen in Lake County. The children in various age groups include 0 to 6 years old, 89 children; 7 to 12 years old, 43 children; and 13 to 17 years old, 60 children.
There were 52 adoptions in Klamath and Lake counties in 2007.
Statewide, 15,060 children were placed in some kind of foster care for at least one day during 2007.
Children go out of the system after reaching age 18 or graduating from high school. Many take an independent living program through Integral Youth Services to develop living skills.
State reimbursements
The state of Oregon provides monthly reimbursement to foster parents. The amount of money depends on the child’s age. The current rates are $399 for children ages 0 to 5, $414 for ages 6 to 12, and $512 for those 13 and older. The reimbursement is meant to cover room and board, clothing replacement, and personal incidentals or allowance.
It usually takes two to three months to be certified as a foster parent, Reyes said. Relatives sometimes go through the process more quickly, but they still must undergo all the requirements as non-relatives.
“Our goal is to return children to their biological parents if possible,” Reyes said, adding that relatives are a second-best choice. “The family provides stability for kids. It’s less frightening.”
If relatives aren’t available, DHS officials try to place with someone who knows the child. “We have a high need for teen homes,” Reyes said.
Help from the community
In addition to help a caseworker can provide, foster parents get support from the Foster Adoptive Parents Association. There’s a clothing closet to help new foster and adoptive parents outfit children, and there’s access to some furniture and car seats.
Faith Tabernacle and United Evangelical Free Church give school supplies and backpacks, Reyes noted.
“This community donates to support the families,” she said. “The churches are fabulous resources. It’s in their hearts to reach out.”
The Child Welfare Office also finds respite care for foster parents.
“They need to take a break,” Reyes said. “It’s healthy for the children and for them.”
Part of potential foster parent assessment is deciding how many children are appropriate for a home. Guidelines are up to seven children for a two-parent household and up to four children for a one-parent household.
Reyes said there is a big need for foster families in which one adult can stay at home with the child or children. The state does not provide day care for children while parents work.
Reyes said potential foster parents must think carefully about getting involved.
“It’s a very big job, being a foster parent,” she said. “It’s a rewarding job, too.”
Becoming a foster parent
Denise Reyes of the state Department of Human Services’ Child Welfare Office presents a monthly forum for those who want to learn more about being a foster or adoptive parent.
Sessions are from 6 to 7:30 p.m. the first Wednesday of every month at the Klamath Youth Development Center, 2200 N. Eldorado Ave. Those wishing to attend are asked to register by calling 850-3663 prior to the meeting.
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